


Interlude Part 1

by harmony88



Series: Forever With You [2]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst and Feels, F/M, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-29
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:41:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27783919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harmony88/pseuds/harmony88
Summary: COMPLETEOnce they are back in the TARDIS following their adventure in 2056, the Doctor reflects.There had been many, many almost moments with her over the years, and tonight should have been a turning point. He wanted it to be. Because if he was being honest, there were only so many times he could think about losing her, to be face to face with the memory of it in fact, before he worried he would break. Before he would give in to his need to be with Rose in every possible way he could, to envelop himself in her, for as long as he had with her.
Relationships: Tenth Doctor/Rose Tyler
Series: Forever With You [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2030980
Comments: 8
Kudos: 148





	Interlude Part 1

The TARDIS was scanning for the rift. A rock had nestled itself comfortably in his stomach the moment Rose went to bed, a combination of anxiety and determination to keep her safe, the amazement he still felt at how she handled the droid tonight, and the unsaid words that were still swimming in his mind. 

He sat in the pilot’s chair fiddling with wires. He was dizzy at the juxtaposition he felt. It was overwhelming, in fact, the memories of when he lost her coupled with the memory of her kiss. There had been many, many almost moments with her over the years, and tonight should have been a turning point. He wanted it to be. Because if he was being honest, there were only so many times he could think about losing her, to be face to face with the memory of it in fact, before he worried he would break. Before he would give in to his need to be with Rose in every possible way he could, to envelop himself in her, for as long as he had with her. 

He needed her. 

His lips still tingled with her kiss, warm and soft and electric as his hands had pulled her body closer than it had been since he picked her up from that parallel world. 

The first time he broke his own rules. The first (and only) time he broke down in tears in front of her. The first time he properly kissed her, so full of love and relief. But they never talk about that moment. He put up walls around it. 

Coward. Every time. 

Sighing, his mind shifted again, thinking of the vials and microchips in her purse that he had thrown in his room. 

He had to keep her safe. 

He pushed the wires aside, running his hand down his face and then back up into his hair, leaving it messy and wild against the dim light of the console. 

He had completely froze when she asked him about them. And if he was being honest, it was less because of fear and more because of… 

Oh, she knows...

The never-ending cycle of his feelings for Rose began again. Wanting her, needing her, fearing losing her. Groaning, he began to punch in the coordinates for New New York afterall. If he knows Rose as well as he thinks he does, she isn’t actually asleep at the moment. He can practically hear her footsteps behind him, he can already imagine the warm feeling her smile will give him, and he already knows she’ll be wearing her favorite rubber duck pajama pants and a tank top like she always does after a stressful day. 

He may not be able to tell her how he feels, but he can show her. She had asked him for chips. He was going to get her chips. 

~~~~  
Sure enough, thirty minutes later, Rose’s groggy footsteps filtered into the TARDIS’s console, where the Doctor was pretending to rest his eyes with his feet perched on the metal rim, hot chips calling her name on her chair. 

She smiled when she saw him, and when she realized he knew she was going to be joining him at some point in the night. Normally she would roll her eyes that her behavior was that predictable, but they needed to talk, even if they didn’t actually say anything, and she was grateful he seemed to agree. “Hello,” she said, and the Doctor’s eyes snapped open. 

“Hello,” he echoed, his legs dropping back down to the ground. He felt his hearts swell when he saw she was indeed wearing those rubber duck pajama pants. “Got you something,” he said, pushing the chips toward her. 

“Thank you,” she hummed, sitting beside him as she took a bite. She moaned involuntarily, and the Doctor felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up straight at the sound. “So good,” she said, chewing. 

“You do love chips,” he murmured. 

“That I do,” she said, her eyes locking with his. 

If he didn’t already know better, the look in her eye told him she wasn’t just talking about chips anymore. Unspoken words lingered in the air again, and the Doctor sniffed and cleared his throat, once again playing with those wires from before. Rose took a bite of a few more chips, watching him, trying to squash the irritation she was feeling at the moment. 

Their kisses today had been...wonderful. They always were, but these were different. It meant something, and she knew it, but she wasn’t here to scold him. She knew, despite the look in his eyes tonight, that they would never be more than what they are now, and she just needed to make sure they were both okay. Because putting aside desires and lingering hands, the parallel universe was penetrating her thoughts, and everytime she closed her eyes tonight she saw her fingers slipping from that lever. She felt the pull of the Void, the flutter of her stomach as it met her heart when she fell, the scream of her name as it left the Doctor’s lips. 

“You okay?” he asked her, seeing her thoughts had drifted away from chips for a moment. She quickly nodded, stuffing more in her mouth. 

“Yea, just thinking,” she muttered. He nodded. 

“Me too,” he whispered. He was silent for a moment before he spoke again, taking in her expression. “I’m sorry, Rose.” 

She furrowed her brow at him, swallowing her bite. He looked so small, so unlike the Doctor that stood up to Peter Geralds, or came to her aid when the droid was malfunctioning.This was much more like the Doctor she had been dreaming about. The one who was screaming. And she suspected, in that moment, the Void Stuff was on his mind too. 

She got up slowly and moved to him, wrapping her arms around his neck as he leaned against her, letting out a long breath of relief at her touch. They didn’t say anything, and she tried to push aside the impulse to plant small kisses on his temple, to grip him so tightly her fingerprints would imprint onto his skin. But instead, she just rested her head on his shoulder and let out a sigh of her own. 

“Talk to me?” she whispered. She felt him stiffen, just as she expected, and she almost let go and returned to her chips while they played their usual game of avoiding meaningful conversation, but he surprised her. His hand slid into hers and he brought it to his lips, pressing small kisses on the inside of her palm. She shuddered. “Doctor-” 

“Shhh. Just...wanna kiss you,” he murmured. She bit her lip to stop a groan from escaping her throat, and he planted small, butterfly kisses down her wrist, back into her palm, before flipping her hand over and lingering on the back of her hand for a moment. “I’m sorry.” 

“Please stop apologizing when you kiss me,” she said, her voice breathier than she meant it to be. He smirked against her skin and lowered their hands back onto the console. 

“Fair enough,” he said quietly. His eyes danced in hers again, just as they had at the gala. Hazel galaxies swimming in chocolate, and neither knew where to begin. He opened his mouth to speak but immediately closed it, and Rose sighed. 

“How do we find the rift?” Rose asked, sensing that talking about their feelings was rendering the Doctor speechless. She regretted it immediately, as the intoxicating gaze he was giving her quickly broke and his face hardened. His eyes flickered back to the wires, and he just sat in silence for a moment. 

“Already working on it,” he said. She nodded. So it was on his mind, then. 

Of course it was. How could it not be? 

“Right,” she said. “Gonna tell me what you’re sorry about then?” 

“Lots of things, Rose,” he muttered. “So many things.” 

She was concerned, looking at him, and she inched her body a little closer to his until her thigh was resting against his knee. His heart rate increased but he kept a stone face, still twiddling with the wires. Finally, Rose placed a hand carefully on his. 

“Stop,” she said. It was the loudest either of their voices had been in minutes, and it caused him to drop everything he was doing and look at her. “You have nothing to apologize for, okay?” 

Oh, but he did. He wanted to tell her everything. That he was sorry he couldn’t commit, or tell her how much she means to him. That he was sorry he was alien and not human because if he was human they would have been together for years now, probably engaged or married and just oh so happy. 

He wanted to tell her he was sorry for getting so upset with her today. And he was sorry she was so scared about the rifts. He wanted to tell her he was sorry he ever lost her in the first place. And he was sorry that fear was holding back from… everything. 

But, as per usual, he didn’t. And he sighed at this pattern in himself, and just squeezed Rose’s hand. 

“If you say so,” he murmured. She watched as his hand slid from hers and his eyes returned to those stupid wires, and she rolled her tongue against her teeth as she began to think, biting her lip and suppressing a sigh. 

She isn’t sure what came over her, but before she knew what was happening she laced her hands into his hair and began to draw small circles with her fingers. He closed his eyes immediately, his breath catching in his throat and his groin growing warmer with each brush of her thumb, but he didn’t stop her. 

She smiled a little as his body relaxed, and she used two fingers to sweep some hair that had fallen into his forehead back into his mane, before moving her hands down his neck and back up onto the top of his head, slowly and calmly. 

His hand came to wrist, stopping her movements. Rose gasped and immediately dropped her hands, afraid she had gone too far. 

But he surprised her again, and he used the hand holding her to pull her a little closer, his legs moving apart so she could rest between them, her weight supported by his chest and the pilot seat. His arms moved to her waist and he hugged her, sighing as her arms wrapped around his neck in response. He once again felt like this is where she belonged, where she was safest. 

“I’m not leaving you,” she whispered, and the Doctor’s grip in her tightened. His impossible human. She always knew what to say. 

“I want that to be true, Rose. I… really do,” he said. It was the most vulnerable thing he had said since the closet kiss, and Rose pressed her head against his cheek. A sound dinged on the scanner, and the Doctor broke the embrace to turn and look at it, keeping his hand locked in Rose’s. “It didn’t find anything,” he said. 

Rose leaned in, peering over his shoulder. “Is that good?” she asked. 

“Yeah,” he breathed out, squeezing her. “It means whatever rift is open isn’t large enough to be detected by my radar, so it’s not a threat. Not yet. We’ll contact Jack, see if he can help, and we’ll keep searching.” 

“Good,” Rose grinned, her side nudging his just a little as her tongue darted between her teeth. “See?” 

He laughed lightly, and shrugged. “Eat your chips, Rose Tyler.” 

The air felt lighter again, and she rolled her eyes as she sat down next to him, chucking another bite into her mouth. She giggled as he snuck one into his mouth, and groaned when he realized they had started to get cold. She scarfed down the remaining food quickly, and stood up to throw the paper bowl away in the bin. “Thank you, Doctor.” 

There was more in those words than she was letting on, and the Doctor sensed it. He smiled at her, genuinely, and nodded. 

He got an idea.

He couldn't tell her. But he could _show_ her....

“I have a surprise for tomorrow. That okay?” he asked. She grinned. 

“Can’t wait.”


End file.
